Following My Conscience

I just realized people have been digging through my conscience and following it, somehow, like the ones working in the nursing home, and trying to follow it and make me not feel so proper, cute, etc., and so good about myself morally and nice to others.  I know it's because bad mothers born in the early 1950s are venting and, essentially, "out to get me."

I'm upset at how I might have been affected.  The people in the nursing home of this area, including the older people staying here, speed through thoughts and don't care for their meaning, like it all has to be enunciated then forgotten.  It's been over a month, now.

I know this also relates to people not wanting you to be proper or "careful."  I do it to look good, even if I don't always seem open.  It's to show nothing matters and you're not "the one," in any way or important and respectable way.